On the eve of Major League Baseball’s Open Day, following a lengthy Lockout this winter, new revelations have come to light on how the lockout ended. During an April Fools Day news conference held at New Gordon Field, Tapey Beercone Commissions Kelly “The Coach” and Eric “The Hammer” revealed the unprecedented steps they took to assist, and potentially save America’s Pastime.
Continue reading “Breaking: Secrets Revealed on How Tapey Beercone Ended MLB’s Lockout”
For years the Buckos Nation has been a safe haven for drinking, smoking, and the other great vices of the world. Often this includes gambling, but never has gambling been combined with the Nation’s pastime, the Sport of Kings. That changed today when, during an April Fools Day news conference, Co-Commissioner Eric “The Hammer” announced a new venture, Total Buckos Sports Betting!
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Today, April 1st, 2020, the Commissioner’s Office of Tapey Beercone announced the immediate and indefinite suspension of the 6th Season of Tapey Beercone due to the growing impacts of the Wuhan Coronavirus Pandemic. While there are as yet no confirmed cases within the Buckos Nation, the Commissioner’s could not guarantee the safety of the player’s leading to this drastic measure.
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For months baseball fans have speculated as to where All-Star free agents Dallas Keuchel and Craig Kimbrel would play in 2019. Those questions where finally answered Monday when both players announced, during an April Fools Day press conference, that they would be taking their talents to Tapey Beercone.
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Rocket Surgery, How a Veteran Completely Rebuilt His Game.
Every rocket launch begins with a moment of tension. Having counted down the seconds until launch the rocket motors are ignited creating a flurry of flame, steam, and percussive sound. Then the moment of liftoff, when the thrust of the rocket motors are just enough to overcome the oppressive force of gravity, allowing the rocket to seemingly hover as it slowly builds momentum taking it up and away from the launch pad. This is a precarious moment. One that often ends in a triumphant column of spaceward bound rocket exhaust, but at times ends tragically in an explosive ball of flames with a spacecraft that fails to clear the launch tower. The same principles apply in Tapey Beercone with Boyd “The Rocket”, and when Season 3 began he failed to launch.
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This morning, during an April Fools Day New Conference, Commissioner of Major League Baseball, Rob Manfred, announced major additions to the MLB Network programming schedule. Chief among these was the new travel/reality show “Swigging for the Fences” which would be produced in partnership with Tapey Beercone.
Per the MLB Commissioner this move represented part of “a concrete strategy to appeal to a younger audience by leveraging the growing popularity of the burgeoning sport of Tapey Beercone to attracted a more youthful viewership.” The show will be hosted by the Co-Commissioners of Tapey Beercone, Kelly “The Coach” and Eric “The Hammer”, with each episode featuring prominent stars and personalities from MLB. As to how Manfred come up with the idea, according to him while listening to one of his favorite Podcasts, the Tipping Pitches Baseball Podcast, he heard the hosts describing the idea and, he “immediately knew this was exactly the kind of show we needed to fix baseball’s image problem with the younger generation”. According to sources within MLB Network, within weeks of the podcast’s airing, a deal had already been reached between MLB and Tapey Beercone and episodes of the show were filming.
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