From the Annals: Musing on Award Recipients from the Early Seasons

Recently, the Commissioner’s Office of Tapey Beercone has Announced New Procedures for conferring Awards for the soon to be concluded Season 5. This continues a tradition begun in Season 3 to end the season by highlighting some of the Sport’s most outstanding players and performances. No such tradition existed prior to that point in the Sport’s history. In fact, the concept of seasons within the Sport of Tapey Beercone was not fully formulated until Season 3, leading Season 1 and 2 to be lumped together as the “Early Seasons” Still, this begs the question: Had awards been handed out in those earliest of seasons, who would they have been given to and why?
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Photos from Oregon Tapey Beercone Invitational 5

The 5th Annual Oregon Tapey Beercone Invitational provided the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat, twice, to a total of 17 players and 2 full time spectators. 2 full cases of Bacchus D were consumed, a large jar of Zesty Pickles was drained of all juices, and the host facility was left with 118 remaining Coor’s light cans.

The Game of Kings also acquired its first actual factual corporate sponsor, Benny’s Donuts. This is a huge victory, as it lends legitimacy to the Sport of Kings while simultaneously promoting donuts, which are good.

Below you can view photos from the album or head directly to the album.

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Gaveltime: Parliamentary Procedure of the Buckos Nation

There is a long and mighty legal tradition in the Buckos Nation. Tapey Beercone, famously created on that frigid January day, wasn’t “born with teeth.” From “Brown v. Education” to “Curtis v. Pile of Rocks” the laws of the Buckos Nation, and the game itself, were sculpted in media res. Any play, action, or stupid thing someone says can potentially trigger the meandering process by which a ground rule becomes codified in the “Official and Governing Rules” of the Sport.

Today, in preparation for the coming Rules Review, we discuss parliamentary procedure and the Buckos Rules of Order. Hang on tight, its gonna be a wild ride.
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Hammer Time: The Beercone: A Material Study – Part IV: Beercone Postmortem

In follow up to my previous posts concerning the material nature of the beercone, I am submitting this brief photo-essay concerning the case of a recently decommissioned beercone.

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Photos from The Ranch, Labor Day 2018

During a Labor Day Weekend work trip to The Ranch, two exciting and combative games of Tapey Beercone were held at Sun-Scorched New Gordon Field. The games pitted Team Reverend Coach against Team Dragon Rocket Hammer. These games will likely close the book on games played at the Ranch during Season 5.

Below you can view photos from the album or head directly to the album.

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Commissioner Memo: Reply to Memo Regarding Upcoming Rules Review and Proposals for Rule Changes

To: Co- Commissioner Kelly “The Coach”
From: Co-Commissioner Eric “The Hammer”
CC: Public Commissioner Memos Blug
Reply to Memo Regarding Upcoming Rules Review and Proposals for Rule Changes

Re: List of Potential Rule Change Proposals

In preparation for the proposed rules review during the Oregon Tapey Beercone Invitational, this Commissioner has reviewed the proposed rule changes and offers the following insights. Rule changes not listed below do not include the complete list of all proposals, but are a subset determined by this Commissioner to require further review from the initial proposal.
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From The Annals: Barnstorming

Tapey Beercone was created in a fit of intoxicated inspiration among a group of friends know collectively as the Buckos, who now preside as the governing Regents of the Sport. These events took place on one of many “Buckos Trips”, epic excursions taken by our group or a portion of it. And so it would followed, as the Annals of Tapey Beercone unfolded all the games took place on these storied Buckos Trips. And at the same time the sport developed, adding written rules, traditions, and statistics, all taking place on Buckos Trips. But eventually this wasn’t the case, and the question became as to how to handle these games?
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7 for 7: Pitching 101

Pitching 101, How a Rookie Pitcher would Re-Write the Book on Pitching with a Beercone.

Through the first two and a half seasons of Tapey Beercone, just eight persons had ever played the game. Of those eight, a core of six, the Regents minus Ryan, constituted the vast majority of player appearances. Within this tight core of players, the characteristics of play became fairly uniform. Sure, every player had their tendencies, and their unique idiosyncrasies, but on the whole the game would look very similar regardless of who was as bat, and who was on the mound. However, as Season 3 turned over to its second half at the start of 2014, the sport entered a phase of rapid player expansion.

Over the course of just two short months, the player pool would expand from eight, to nineteen! With the growth of the player base would come a divergence in playing style, as no longer were the players all rooted in a common tradition dating back to the Piney Pinecone days. This tail is about one of those players; a pitcher. A pitcher who had his own unique style and delivery, a pitcher who would ride that uniqueness all the way to being named season 3’s Pitcher of the Season.
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Hammer Time: The Beercone: A Material Study – Part درې: Tape

Continued from Part Deux

The tape is an energy field that connects all living things. It surrounds us, sticks to us, and binds the universe together. Yeah, its some pretty mystical stuff, but what it isn’t is consistent between brands. Of the vast array of tapes, only one has received the Ballsmith’s Mark of Approval. A Good tape must have the following properties:
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